Cigarettes are awesome

Simply the best and easiest way to inflict self pain in order to level with the world and all the bullshit in it.

The non smokers say oh it's a billion dollar industry and all that and those white colored assholes are making big bucks off your ignorance and you are dying slowly... Well my niggas I been wanting to die ever since I became conscious. Ain't no denying it I want this shit over with. I foresee and reason out things to not do them but if anyone else can do it they agree with me.

Cigarettes are so amazing they're like gods gift for the wise and sane. Someone keeps telling me to meditate using the vapinassa medication techniques but they don't realize I'm not upset with the world or sad or mad... I'm simply bored.

Life is a bitch when you're sober because that's the realist reality there is to conceive. Girls want my soul, men want my trust, and my family wants me to honor their loyalty to me. But nobody can force me to be happy... Know why? Because nobody is actually happy. They chase themselves on their hamster wheels in order to get a bit of dopamine and endorphins rush and act tough and say oh I'm happy look at me. It draws attention because others say oh you're so happy how'd you do it. It's a lie and a fake coverup for the realist of the real point of view at this world.

No doubt some days I am so happy I feel I'm on top of the world, and those days every thing alive on this planet that can convey its emotions wants to spend time with me. But how long does it last before I'm down once again and I need their help in feeling alright?
We leech off each other because its all we got to go to. Religion is a theory of the best things to put faith into, and facts are what make atheist scientists comfortable with being alive. But look me in the eyes and tell me you know that there isn't a god and don't trip for five seconds over all the negativity and confidently tell me that there is no god and all you do is turn your head the other way or start questioning what I'm about to relate to me.
I'm not looking for a shady sketched out relative point of view because anything that's true as humans need water to survive is something every alive mother fucker agrees to. And that's a fact I believe in. It's not that I got a lot of faithin it... I just believe it because I can go my whole life and not be able to deny it. That's the difference between faith and belief.

Cigs for life.

Tupac - breathin

Now I'm the last motha fucka breathin.

I wish it wasn't so boring up here but I guess everyone got their destinies to live with. Even fate dont fuck with me up here. All little low riders are see through from up here. I can see through em so well that I see myself starrin at the trees and mountains for so long I nearly go into shock from time to time. I smack myself and say "haris!" And then I go about living alone in this boring life once again.

Who got more shit figured out than me? I need help from you if you exist my nigga. And btw I don't believe in racism cuz that's one of the elementary ignorant ideas just like believing in evolution.


But seriously I mean it this time. If you have knowledge get at me. But till then don't call my ego ignorance. Cuz that shit is backed by something more valuable than gold. Time and information is the two most limited resources we got. Nobody made a legit time machine yet but I got the most hold on legit information about who and why people belong where they are.

I'm no know it all... I'm just as ignorant as everyone else from time to time cuz I got human tendencies but when it's on... Try and stare at me in my eyes and try to hide your soul from being read by me if you can please. Stephen king ain't got shit on me.

The good die young (tupac again)

Good sad song to cry over sad painful realities of the world; death and the emotional trauma that your soul gets set aflame about on.

The good die young... Can anyone tell me whyyyy (female voice) the good die young (PAC holding down the legit tone thing feel) . Sigh.

A deep satisfying sigh is all that is really owed to sad thoughts after hours and days of contemplating and crying.

Picture me rolling

I ain't got love for these niggas, ain't no need to be friends.

PAC said it but I lived it my whole life. Who's realler? Lol I can take shots at PAC ain't that a delusion

The junk food displayed

Uh the title explains more than needed

Junk fooding ATM

West side outlawwwwwees.. Lol it's just 2pacs of shakur in my ears making me say that.

But on the real tho I'm eating the shit out of this junk food and drinking coffee after I had a fat strong mug of chai this morning... Makes no sense (just almost farted from motility comin about). Hot damn this life be boring some times.

Someone save me from my boring self and teach me to let go of my religious bullshit worries and just live this life for what really was... A gift to enjoy everything experienceable (lol for now).

Now it's the song every block is kinda mean but on our block we still play song

drake - she will

she will...

young money (?)

yea... fo...

ehm. I tell her "now go on n pop that pussy for a real nigga"

niggas is jealous but really i could care less

devil on my shoulder, lord is my witness

i'm weighin sins and forgiveness


i tried to pay attention but attention payin me

talk is still cheap

i rock to the beat of my drumset (his father/uncle's drummer reference ?)



She just pop it for a sec and look back at me and sayd 'baby its reallll'

and i say "i ain't doubt u for a sec" i squeeze it in and i could tell her how it feel

but here baby you know the deal.

she ain't gonna get it but maybe she will...





man this song sounds so fucking fun to visualize and go through. but again, i'm stuck a fucking muslim! WHAT THE HELL M8's

I'm an atheist wannabe

Seriously. This isn't a joke.

I have been brain washed into believing Islam is the right religion. I can't claim it's not because then I would be lying.. Hence the brain washing.

You know there are two types of people in this world in my view; those that believe in God, and those that don't care to believe in God.

If God is so merciful, why doesn't he show us visible proof of his existence, the atheists welcome me with their logic... But then the snippet of the brain washed enigma inside my mind speaks and says "Haris... You believe a God so great cares about any of this mumbo jumbo? Look at this loser here... He's going to go to Heaven you think? No! He's going to hell! Just stop listening to his bullcrap altogether. Go pray to replenish your faith gauge if you must. Just stop this idiocy now. Turn your head to his retard-logic if you must!"

Meanwhile a side of me dies. And I mean DIES. I forever lose a friend, and I also think that "oh... those happy possibilities... weren't meant for me. How sad this is." And I cry for a couple of seconds and even make weird taking-an-agitated-poo faces but nothing helps... I am stuck in my silly old brainwashed mindset.

If there is any atheists out there that can help to motivate me enough to start having sex with random hot women... PLEASE I BEG OF YOU! Man that stuff is way too silly too pass up on I feel.. And I keep falling victim to being silly like this... What the heck man!



P.S.
This blog topic is the beginning of many writings to come under this topic.

my expressions start to end w/ stupids

life from my pov as a guy

I said "you experience the high high's, and then basically choose to go through the extreme low's"

and i said "i experience the low high's, and then choose to go through the not-so-extreme low's"

you telling me which way of life is more right? I choose to plan ahead. Even if it means my seed will end... It's not like it takes a lifetime to impregnate someone if I really want... and getting girls' phone number, attention, or company has never really been even a want of mine and i've gotten so many offers. imagine if i wanted it... bro there is not a thing i want in this world.

It is filled with pain. There is no happiness. There is nothing to chase. There is nothing worth chasing. This is as real as it gets. understand what the world around you points to. And you too will begin to have faith in the unknown just like me. And that unknown is life after death. If This part tripped you up so much that you can neglect all my reasoning... You're just stuck addicted to your ways that you can't reason out of them or even fathom outside of them.

Be a trend setter. Don't be a part of the herd. That's what I ask, but people can only carry the convo for 5 secs before them and I are both bored.


"This life I lead" mother fucker. Call me a psycho.

Belief vs Faith