I think all my god complexes

and social status complexes
stem from having a lack of self worth.
My emotions got played with for a week long.
Those weeks I had no idea what I was doing,
But my ego was at stake.
So I did what was best for not me,
But my image.
And now when people drop the image on me
that "hey you look like judge dredd"
Which I googled and is this Sylvester Stalone movie
where he's this badass that whoops on every guy all by himself.
I needed consoling on how to take that compliment,
Because I was confused as to if it could be taken a bad way.
I am so tortured by my self image as a result... I always
Think it's negative, a lot more negative than positive I suppose.



Well I was feeling a lot worse about 10 mins ago.
I feel calmer now.
I just have no way to enjoy life.
Other than write down that I am enjoying life.
Honestly that's as close to real life enjoyment as I have.
This is my shoes.
Welcome to them.
How do you like it?
Because if it isn't written down, it isn't true.
Right? Even God says to try and come up with your own Quran/holy book/book of rules if you can.
Well, let's do it.
We got time on earth apparently.
Let's put it to some use at least... So god knows we definitely had him in mind.
It's not like that sky daddy person needs us to worship him.
So just focus on worshipping only when it's due.
Unless you're in need.
Then you're allowed to beg in my book.
I know I've done my fair share of begging to God.
Doesn't mean I've quit.
Who knows.
But those are just my suggestions, backed with my life story so you know where I'm coming from.
Writing is like directing a movie that is live at all times.
But I was feeling powerful tonight. Don't knkow if I will have
such an experience later on.
Or maybe I'll have a better one later.
Who knows.
Be positive right.